I hate my friend for all the right reasons.


I remember when everyone adored my face whenever they cross the bridge en route to South Superhighway.

I hate my friend because times changed.

Should this garner a reaction? Damn it, it should.

Why? Because it is un-awesomizing my awesome existence.




First, when he asked me to pose for a shoot, I was given the role meant for a character actor. Damn it, I had a freakin’ billboard for crying out loud! You can’t just make me do bit parts! Now I know how RR Herrera feels…

And then, I forced to do poses that would pretty much make me an ass. Add the fact that I had to wear a viciously ghastly wardrobe. Even a class clown wouldn’t dress like post-Halloween trick-or-treater! What’s the big idea anyway?

And finally, I asked him to lipo me to no avail. Whoever will see this, I have surrendered the fact that I would be laughed at. But come on, I am a JPEG image here! FHM models get skin and body remodeling!

DID I MENTION THAT I HAD A FREAKIN BILLBOARD!?!

He doesn’t know it yet, but my artist-friend has unknowingly smelled my farts because that’s what I do whenever I cross his cubicle!

Not to mention I always give my godkid a bunch of stuffs that could probably destroy random furniture…

DID I MENTION THAT I HAD A FREAKIN BILLBOARD!?!

Game over!

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