We Legally Welcome Your Existence

Scientists found a new breed of lizard that has the height of a basketball power forward and the face of a politician.

Haha, I made an opinionated remark!

They call this new breed the Northern Sierra Madre Forest Monitor Lizard which means that the species could be seen as far as the foothills of the Ilocos Region and could probably extend to the upper tips of Central Luzon (since the Sierra Madre mountain range goes as far as Quezon). A dragon-lizard a la the Komodo, it can grow up to six feet but could only beef himself up with a miniscule 22 pounds!

This new breed of reptile claimed fame when biologists saw a couple of hunters flicking a big dead lizard but they didn’t mind this at first. Aetas like the lizard’s meat which is said to be tender and resembles that of a lizard (haha). It was first seen in 2001 and gained new specie status on April 6, 2010.

Asked if this breed is endangered, it seems like it isn’t.

Meanwhile residents near their ecosystem fear that one day, they’ll look up and they see the 2-meter lizard walking around their ceiling.

Worse, when it’s 6 o’clock and the lizard begin to descent the ceiling to kiss the floor.

No arowana is big enough to eat it.

Game over.