Creepy Taxi Driver

He was the creepiest taxi driver I have ever seen.

At first he doesn’t look much of a threat.

But as you travel with him... it was as if you’re in some absurd dimension.

I just had coffee with my GF. We do this a lot. We talk about our day and stuffs in general. Those conversations are integral to destroy work stress.

The other day I saw Will Devaughn at Starbucks Strata.

Ay papa!


It was around 1:45am when I took a bus from Shaw Boulevard to Ever Commonwealth and it was around 2:15am when I got off the bus to ride a taxi because at that point there are no tricycles en route to my subdivision.

Normally I would ride the huge herd of Reno taxis parked around the area. However, I saw a non-Reno taxi. I felt compelled to ride the taxi because his face was almost begging me to ride his vehicle because a frequent commuter in that area would always take a Reno taxi.

So I rode his taxi... thus defying the norm.  


I don’t know if this was the first time he hanged around in the Don Antonio / BF / Mapayapa area but it seems he is oblivious in every street we entered. Worse, he was mumbling most of the time. I was sitting at the passenger seat next to him and I couldn’t understand the things that come out of his mouth. His voice reminded me of SOCO’s Gus Abelgas without the TV personality’s clarity when he speaks. Worse, he wasn’t a brute as he was polite – which even more scared the shit off me.

It was like those horror movies where an always-smiling man was wielding a knife en route to a killing spree! 

I began to somewhat shout my words and use hand gestures for directions because every time I speak his head creeps to my side. Nope, he was not gay. Gay people have style. If his style is to look like a mangy goat then he must be gay (at this point gays everywhere would disown him). His driving was at the 10 to 40kph which made me conclude that his driving is troubling his mumbling. He also made a full stop on a hump slide that you can pass using the second gear and mumbled that the hump slide was... he mumbled words I couldn’t understand when he saw the hump slide. He also questioned every detail of the environment which as time went on was freaking me and at the same time... annoying the hell off me.

And then it hit me.

He was an idiot.

Okay... I’m a bit harsh.

Let’s just combine the terms ignorant and creepy.

For the sake of earning a passenger, he went to unchartered territory. Anyway at least he brought me home safely. But just like any other taxi driver that isn’t from any major taxi company, he was pleading for a tip.

From 30 pesos flag down and Php2.50 per meter the rates increased to 40 pesos flag down and Php3.50. Taxis had their increase but what about the regular working person who spends his time and effort giving his hard-earned cash to transportation fees?

When I get my increase, you get your tips!

Suck it.

Besides, taxi drivers will find ways to cheat the machines much to everyone’s chagrin.

A random Tulfo brother is watching closely their every step.

If there is a lesson I need to learn from this experience, it is that I need to not ride no-named taxis during the wee hours especially if they don’t have telephone numbers at the side of the doors... and if they look like persons capable of goat rape.  

The other? Mumbling gibberish while driving would make anyone creepy and moronic.

Game over!


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